Monday, 15 December 2008

Santas Sack!

Today I went to see Santa in Manchester, it was pretty fancy inside the big shopping centre, I prebooked it online but was disappointed when I got there as there were no elfs just some women wearing green suits with lots of makeup on!

As we entered the grotto it looked pretty neat, although Santa what can i say? He must have been on a running machine or done atkins! he simply was not FAT enough! Jay looked like he was going to cry till he gave him some chocolate...what a great example we give our children...except chocolate from chubby weird men who look kinda creepy, still Jay wasnt too keen until he gave him a pressie all wrapped up...maybe thats why he didnt cry....

We had our picture taken it was all rather modern, didnt even see a camera it was attached and hidden you could see it on the monitor! it wasnt a very good picture either but its a memory (I will need to scan it) or something as i dont own a scanner its a little prehistoric!

As we stepped out there was a desk all fancy like saying here are your pictures and your options, you can have this thing, this and this for £10 or these 2 pics for £7.50, ok 2 pics will do, they look crap but when my kids are 15 I doubt they will want to go and sit on santas knee! so its a nice memory to look back on.

I was going to give santa my list but he didnt look like the real one, certainly with not having enough fat around his body, I didnt want to take my chances

So santa if you read my list this is what i want


OK i wont be greedy, thats all i want, I need at least 2 million pounds though as 1 million just wont be good enough as I have alot of things I want and need to get on with and being such a peasant is not good for the soul, for me or people around me, not to mention the debts I have landed myself in as I punch in my credit card number online thinking its only please please please santa if you think im a good girl or you have not been doing your job properly observing my behaviour send me that winning lotto ticket so I can live my life the way i want too without any boundries! I know i would make so many people happy with it!

Also id like to grow some big tits...without the surgery and please make sure they dont sag!

1 comment:

justme said...

LOL hilarious and you are right we are not meant to be peasants. Someone got the wrong notes on us up there maybe that fat man will set things straight now!